Listening

Part II Feb 2..Continued
When I arrived at Lewistown Hospital..he was still alive but barely breathing and hanging literally on for dear life. He was being prepped to be transferred to Geisinger in Danville, PA. He asked why they didn't take him by ambulance and was told he wouldn't make it. He got the helicopter ride "of a lifetime." So now as I stand and watch this helicopter fly away...I wonder what the heck am I gonna do??? I had made a few phone calls..to my core people. We all have them and we know who they are but it is hard to make the call cause it felt like I was dreaming. But, I called my sister Paige who was on her way up and told her to come get me. I was going home to check on my dogs and pack a bag. The hospital was 2 hours away! I took a deep breath and kind've relaxed. I wasn't sure what was to become of all of this and whether or not I would ever see him again or not. It was strange. I was scared but numb all at the same time. Facing death is really strange. And I guess I really wasn't sure if I was or not...I knew it was bad but I just didn't know how bad. So anyway, she and Stevie (her friend) came to get me and we headed to Danville. The roads were terrible. Ice, rain and snow..all I wanted to do was wakeup from what I was feeling. But we made it and he was there. He had already gone through surgery and had had 3 stents put in. He was extremely tired but optimistic. They did an emergency catherization and put the stents in. He wasn't really sure what was next and we didn't realize how serious everything was. It was definitely looking better though. Our son Jake was in route to be here. He lives in Florida and had got the 1st plane out. I was worried about him too. But he made it to Philly where a friend of ours picked him up. I went to my sisters house for the night and met Jake there. He got in about 3 in the morning. He and I sat up and talked till prolly 4am. We slept for about 1 1/2 hours and then got ready to head back to the hospital. It still felt very strange to me to be going to the hospital. I was still dealing with the unrealistic aspect of it. But I got ready, put on my big girl panties and made my way north to see the man I had been in love with for 29 years. He had been my world and I was afraid I would never hear his heart beat again. Sometimes when things are bad and I mean really bad, we all need to stop and listen, really listen cause only then can we really hear...what is really important...a heart beat.....

The Beginning Feb 2, 2011

Just when you think everything about your life is great and it will never change...well it does. Wednesday February 2, 2011 was like every other cold, icy day in Belleville, PA. We had heavy ice and frigid temps. As always my husband Pnut and I would get up and make a cup of coffee and head outside to let our 2 dogs take a little run. Mind you, we were lighting up cigarettes as we hit the door! Both of us smoked, partied on the weekends like it was 1999 and never thought about doing anything different except maybe one day to stop smoking. We talked about it and even tried a few times but never followed through. Both of us happy people with lots of friends. We enjoy camping, racing, fishing and anything outdoors. AND we are not old. I am 50 and he is 53.
So our day is like any other freezing day...he stayed home from work because of all the ice so we just hang out. Watch some TV and around 2:30 I tell him it is time to get our butts in shape! Let's work out. So we get ready and decide to do Tony Horton's P90X! I had done this workout before and had seen great results. He had been working on the bowflex for about 2 weeks prior to this and wasn't seeing great results but was still optimistic. So 3pm rolls around and we start Day 1 Chest and Back. After about 30 minutes in, Pnut starts having some shortness of breath. He is walking back and forth to the bathroom and then to the kitchen. I asked "are you ok?" He said "I worked a muscle I have never worked I guess, and I can't catch my breath." He is rubbing the part of the shoulder where your rotator cuff is so I am assuming he just pulled something. But it continues...he has no pain but can't breathe and the tightness is intensified! I finally asked "do I need to call 911?" He said "yes!" So I call and the beginning of our new lives begins...From this day forward we listen to his heart beat...To be continued :)